Monday night my husband and I had a most romantic date night. It didn’t involve going out to eat or going ice skating. No, it was much more low key than that. My day at work had been particularly stressful, as days working for a newspaper often are, but he picked up on this when he stopped by the office to drop off my keys. He never said anything, just went about the rest of his day and when I finally got off of work I asked where he wanted to go out to eat for our date. He responded with, “We have other plans!” Well that’s enough to get a girl down-right giddy. A thousand scenarios ran through my mind about what we might be doing. As I pulled up to the house I noticed two movie rentals in the passenger seat of my car and when I walked through the door that man of mine was cooking dinner, had roses on the table and a sweet love note in a card. To put a little icing on the cake, while we were watching the movie, he also did a little laundry. Is every night of our lives like this glorious one? No, not at all! Do we always do exactly what is expected from our spouse? Of course not. But should we strive to be the best person that we can be for our spouse? Yes, we really should. One of the movies we watched that night was about a man and woman who fell in love. It was the typical, take your breath away love story, but this one had a little catch to it. See, the husband couldn’t have children and the wife wanted children more than anything else. She wanted a child so badly that she made herself and her husband miserable over it. Instead of focusing on all of the positive things that they had in their lives together, she chose the one downfall of the relationship and harped on it at every turn. There was nothing the husband could do to help this pain and eventually she left him because of it. The scene is absolutely heartbreaking as the camera pans around the room showing all of the beautiful artwork the couple had acquired together and pictures of their wonderful love together being torn apart. After a period of time she comes back to him and realizes that it is never helpful to focus on the one thing that isn’t right about your relationship. It is always better to focus on the positive. She quit lingering on the fact that she couldn’t have a child with her husband and started realizing all of the things that she actually did have with her husband. It made me think of many marriages that I see today. So many spouses are focused on the wrong things that their significant other does that they fail to see all of the good things that they do. If you are married to someone, point out their positive traits and detour your thoughts from the negative. It is never healthy to live your life focused wholly on the negative. You will find that your relationship and your life is much more life-giving when you are praising your spouse for the positive instead of beating them over the head constantly about the negative.

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